I Have No Sex Drive. What Can I Do?

When you start having thoughts such as, “I have no sex drive and my husband is mad”, you may wonder what can be done to resolve this. When you have no sex drive, it may feel like you’re in a hopeless situation, but you’re not alone in feeling this way. Many women also experience having a low sex drive.

Having a low sex drive doesn’t mean that it’s your fault. So, don’t blame yourself or feel guilty about it. Try to remain as positive as possible while working to improve your marriage. Your marriage should be a source of love, support and compassion. Once you feel comfortable, try talking to your husband. Start by sharing your innermost thoughts and feelings with him.

Let him know if you’ve been feeling happy, sad, indifferent, or upset in any way. Having this conversation with your husband will help to clarify the situation for him. He should listen to you and support you without passing judgment or criticism. During this time, you need encouragement and understanding from him.

After talking to your husband, if you realize you haven’t been feeling like yourself lately, it’s time to look into some potential causes of having a low sex drive.

Health Reasons

One potential cause of having a low sex drive can be related to your health. Your mental health and your physical health play a large role in your sex life. If you’re not feeling well mentally and physically, that can negatively impact your sex drive.

To manage your mental and physical health, now is a good time to visit your doctor for a health checkup. You can explain how you’ve been feeling along with any other symptoms (including having no sex drive) that you may have. Your doctor will ask you some questions and run some tests to identify any potential issues.

Remember, potential issues can be mental health issues, physical health issues or a combination of both.

Mental Health

Some mental health issues that may exist can be related to anxiety, depression or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). If you’ve been feeling worried, uneasy, stressed, nervous or restless, you may be experiencing an unhealthy amount of anxiety. If you’ve been feeling sad, hopeless, unmotivated or disinterested in life, you may be experiencing a bout of depression.

To help manage your mental health, you may need to see a therapist to discuss options, techniques and healthy coping mechanisms. A therapist helps to create a safe space for you to understand yourself better and to discover new ways to approach unhealthy thoughts and feelings.

When you manage your mental health properly, you can prevent more serious issues from occurring that can affect your physical health. Mental health issues have a direct impact on your body. Your mental health can greatly impact your physical health.

Physical Health

Your physical health should be managed properly just as your mental health. If you’re not physically healthy, that also impacts your sex drive. You can develop chronic headaches, high blood pressure or have trouble eating and sleeping.

Also, any chronic conditions that you may have or certain medications that you are taking can impair your sexual desire or arousal. Too much alcohol consumption also plays a role in having no sex drive.

There are different issues that can impact your sex drive. As you learn how to manage your mental health and your physical health, your sex drive should start to improve. In the meantime, you can try some non-sexual intimacy ideas to help you rebuild your emotional and physical intimacy.

Non-Sexual Intimacy

Improving intimacy within your marriage can deepen the bond between you and your husband. When you feel understood, accepted and cared for, you feel better mentally, physically, and emotionally.

Try these non-sexual intimacy ideas to build a deep, meaningful connection with your husband and to support your overall wellbeing.

After trying these ideas, talking to your husband, and visiting a doctor or a therapist, you should be headed in the right direction towards improving your sex drive.

For more resources and support, visit our helpful resources page and download a FREE copy of our eBook, The Marriage Repair Handbook.